We all do it, some more than others, some every day, some hardly ever, but one thing is for sure; we all lose our shit at some time in the morning and yell at our kids. And today it was my turn.
And now as my kids have gone to school and Alex* has gone out with the babysitter, I am writing this with utter regret and a heavy heart.
I try and make mornings as stress-free as possible as I know the slightest thing can set Sarah* off, and our morning can turn from ‘happy-go’lucky’ to complete and utter chaos! This morning Sarah wasn’t the one that totally lost it; was me.
Ooops. Massive Ooops. But you know what as Mum’s we are all trying our best and having kids is hard work. Especially when you have a child with ADHD, or as a double whammy you have it yourself (I too can get sidetracked and this morning, I got majorly distracted)!
Every morning we have essential oils burning and meditation music playing; I tell my husband it’s all for Sarah (but it’s for me too). I find the chaos, rush and haphazardness of having three kids and trying to get everyone dressed, ready, eat breakfast, and out the door so hard!
I am sure that everyone feels like this, but I sometimes wonder if it’s just me? But I am pretty confident that the majority of Mums probably hate weekday mornings; that small window when you need to get so much done in so little time.
This morning was entirely my fault. Sarah was fantastic, she got dressed, fed the dogs and we all ate pancakes (which I made the night before). It was 8 am, and I felt we were all on track, so Sarah and I decided to look at outfits on the internet. She has got her first school disco on Friday night so it’s a big deal looking cool when you are eight!
We looked at pictures and giggled and life was great until I looked at the clock, and realised that we had approximately 5 minutes to get everyone out the door!
I looked at *Belle and Alex, who were running around, underpants on their heads, socks on their hands; school bags weren’t ready, they weren’t dressed, Sarah hadn’t had her supplements or her oils, and I started ‘losing my shit’. I screamed and shouted my way through everything and then after five minutes, apologised calmed the funk down and looked at their little faces.
Belle was crying, Alex handled it like a dude and was fine. Sarah was so worried about me, running around asking everyone to be good, help Mummy and stop crying.
I took in some deep breaths, dried my tears (pathetic I know), and told everyone how sorry I was. I explained that sometimes Mummy makes mistakes too and it wasn’t a good idea to look at ‘party inspiration’ on Pinterest at 8 am on a Thursday morning.
I got everyone in the car, and Sarah and started laughing. She said, “Mummy if that’s what people look like when they get angry, then I never want to get angry again”.
She was amazing today; I was so proud of her. Today her ADHD and anger weren’t a problem; it was mine. But you know what, we all have those moments, every single person does, because perfection doesn’t exist, we are only human.
These are my tips for making mornings easier (that most times I get right);
1. Get all the clothes ready the night before and lay them in the bedrooms – I even do this for myself
2. Socks and shoes ready by the door
3. Lunches made and water bottles filled and in the fridge – I do this when I’m doing the dinner
4. I make gluten and dairy free pancakes for the kids most days and make the pancake mix and leave it in the fridge the night before – I also do this when I’m making dinner
5. All school bags and toddler bags ready – have everything the child needs for school the next day. In my toddler bag, I have spare clothes, and an extra teddy in case I can’t find his trusted teddy the next morning
6. In the bathroom I have everything laid out for Sarah, toothbrush, toothpaste, hairbrush, hair bobbles, sunblock – this saves so much time
7. All homework to be done the night before
8. Children’s tasks to be printed out in their room – to include getting ready, making the bed, etc.
9. Make sure that the children are dressed, hair done, shoes on, before breakfast – then after breakfast there isn’t much to do
10. I have got three hooks by the back door where I put their school coats, bags, etc., and I also put all their clean socks in the basket and their shoes by the door.
These are the little things that work for us as a family in the mornings (usually). Hopefully, they can help you too. Most of them time no one looks at their lists in their rooms; the mornings are still hectic and time I am sure goes extra fast before 9am. But, this structure, although not perfect, really does help (note to self, no Pinterest at 8 am). I always try and do as much as I can the night before, sometimes I am exhausted and I don’t, but then I regret it the next day and promise myself that I won’t do that again!
Have a great day everyone! And one final thought.
Friday morning….I am coming to get ya!!
* Names have been changed to protect identities